In the past few weeks, I have spoken a lot about women.
Women rights, feminism, bahus and girlfriends.
Today, I am going to try and talk about the clan from Mars.
Age-old proverb, Men are from Mars, Women from Venus – So, we are opposites.
The fact that we are opposites, or better yet, not equal has been made historical with the imprint of this proverb. So, what do men and women really do when they have been taught right from early years that both the species are different from each other, as different as chalk and cheese, so different that they need to apparently live on different planets.
Other than the biological differences in men and women, in my opinion, there aren’t any. Everything else that the world believes in is merely for the sake of romanticism or to establish this disparity between men and women even further. Men and women feel the same things, the intensity of which may differ, but they do feel and experience the same things.
We all feel pain and pleasure, hunger and heat, curious and cold, and for each other. When a certain sect of women tell you that they are feminists, it does not always necessarily mean that they are anti-men. That’s far from the truth. Feminists are different from chauvinists.
The sole agenda of feminism is to uplift the status of women so that men and women can be at the same level. It does not, in any form, justify uplifting the status of women at the cost of men.
Now that we have established this fact, I agree that a lot of women take due advantage of feminism. If there are reserved seats for women in a bus, but there are more men than women travelling, I don’t think it is wrong for a man to take a reserved seat. In the wake of situations where the old, the tired or the sick, need to take a seat, it is wrong for a woman to exercise her radicalism and occupy the women-only seats.
Reputation of men in the past have been maligned by society – It is very easy to use men as a slapstick for allegations of molestation, domestic violence and eve-teasing and law is extremely lenient towards women who make these allegations – We all agree that atrocities against women is a rising epidemic in the country, but at the same time, undue advantage of this situation taken by women must be scrutinized and punished.
We must also remember that there are men who violate, but there are also men who support and protect – Let us not use the acts of few people (irrespective of gender) to generalize stereotypes.
Gender is never a criteria or a deciding factor for choices an individual makes.
So, it really comes down to humanity, right?
Men are not really that different from women.
Men feel pain and cry, maybe not in front of us, but they do.
Maybe women cry more, maybe in front of everyone, maybe in isolation.
Some women don’t cry at all.
So it is not about men and women, it is about human beings.
Men are expected to behave in a certain way in the society too, which too plays a part in isolating them from women. Men are expected to be strong and protective. Men are expected to become engineers and doctors. Men are stereotyped to be macho. Men are expected to earn a living. Men are expected never to break down.
These are expectations, societal expectations that feel the need to strongly reinstate that men are really from Mars.
I know men who are not that strong physically. But they have other interests in life than lifting a barbell at every given opportunity. I know men who are chefs and fashion designers and make-up artists. And no, they are not gay. I know men who look after their kids while the wife runs the shop. That doesn’t make them any less of a man.
So, gender equality on one side, my request to all the ladies out there!
Let’s not use feminism or the “Men are from Mars, and Women Need Protection” theory to bash men.
Let’s not be a part of a generation that scoffs at a chivalrous guy who opens the door for you – Because, he doesn’t do it because he is a guy and you’re too weak to pull your own door – He does that because he is a well natured human.
Men are just like us, as sweet and caring as any woman could be, as strong or weak as any woman is and as hopeful or spiteful as you make him out to be.
And let’s not talk about Mars and Venus, for we are all from Earth, and noone’s leaving anytime soon.